21 weeks, 3 days
One of the final announcements we had to make was perhaps the most far-reaching – the social media announcement.
From the beginning we weren’t sure how to go about putting anything on Facebook or even if we did so at all. Lots of people make a statement by putting up a photo of their 12-week scan while others are 100% against posting anything at all, feeling this is something personal and that they would’ve told everyone they cared about in person.
I didn’t fall into either camp – neither dying to shout it from the rooftops at the earliest opportunity nor wanting to keep it a precious secret until school photos start appearing a few years’ later – and nor did Mr S. What became more evident as weeks went on is I began to find it strange that I would make updates on my life nearly every day, yet I wouldn’t mention the most important thing that had ever happened to us.
This was especially the case when I got further into the pregnancy and we told more and more people. First of all, telling everyone not to put it on Facebook just like we were keeping a dark secret, while it also felt strange that lots of people close to us didn’t even know – or perhaps they had found out but didn’t want to say anything as we hadn’t said anything publicly.
As time went on, the chances of this happening became greater and yet I really wanted to hear all those congratulations. After all, this was the greatest achievement of our lives together so far, and it should be something that is celebrated.
We initially decided to say something at week 12 after our scan. Then we realised we had a lot of people to tell directly – close friends, family, people at work. About a week later, we had made our close announcements, but this coincided with our scare. After this, I felt very vulnerable, as a person, with the pregnancy, with everything.
Even after we told everyone at work, I still felt terrified of something going wrong. I made a decision to make that FB announcement after the 16-week midwife appointment as this was when I thought I’d be able to hear the heartbeat. Alas, I didn’t get to hear the heartbeat, so aside from gaining weight and a thicker girth, I had no proof the pregnancy was still going okay.
After this, I thought it’d be best to simply wait till our 20-week scan. I just didn’t want to announce something if we were going to find out something was really wrong at the scan. It felt like ages waiting for the scan, especially knowing that we were planning to make the big revelation afterwards.
That day of our 20-week scan was therefore amazing for lots of reasons. First of all, we could see our beautiful baby properly, then learn that s/he was as healthy as they could be, then we could tell the world how happy we were at this special time of our lives.
That evening, I made the big announcement and I was incredibly excited to do so. We got more than 70 likes and lots of happy comments and it was lovely to finally share our secret.
Not everyone waits as long as we do or even chooses to put it on FB at all. Everyone reveals it to their friends and family in a different way, but having it out in the open felt like a big weight was lifted from my shoulders. I’m so happy, I want to shout it from the rooftop – and I finally can!
2) Face rash
3) Sore back
4) Pressure on belly
5) Breathless when walking up stairs